I had another miscarriage.
It's a total bummer.
I have been having some "issues" again so I thought something might be up. But I have been so sick. I kept telling myself that was a good sign. I guess not. I cried all the way home from the doctor's office and when I had to tell the kids. But I have been warning them all along that something still could happen to the baby, just like last time. They will be fine. Ben tried to cheer me up in his own unique way. He said that he is not that sad because the baby would have just thrown up everywhere and cried constantly. He made me laugh. I love my kids.
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At the doctor's office when I had my ultrasound the doctor kept pointing out all these things that shouldn't be there like an "unusual fluid pocket" and a "mysterious" clotty like mass. The one thing that he couldn't find, sadly, was a heartbeat. So now I have to decide if I want a D&C or if I want to wait to see if my body will pass it on it's own. I am not sure what to do. One thing that really bums me out is that now I have to be sick for no reason until I pass this thing.
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I am at peace.
It is what it is. There is no sense in dwelling on the situation. I have four amazing kids to focus on. If that is all I ever have than I will still be the happiest Mom in the world. Life is an amazing journey. I choose to not waste a single second feeling sorry for myself. I have the best life I could have ever hoped for!
10 comments:
Oh Lara! I am so sorry! You will be in my prayers.
Lara...I am so sorry! You guys are in our thoughts and prayers. Miscarriage is never easy...You are such a great example of love and courage.
We love the Ziebarths!
What a great attitude, Lara. I'm sad that you guys have to go through this. Again. At all. Hang in there. We love you guys!
Your whole extended family loves you, and though we all feel bad for you and your famiy, we know you are strong and will get through this too!
Oh Lara, my heart is aching for you!
But my heavens, what an amazing woman you are. What an example of remembering the eternal perspective of things you are.
And truly, what a blessing that even though life isn't roses all the time, the gospel still brings peace.
We love you! Praying for miracles. (:
I am so sorry sweet Lara that you are experiencing this again. You are an incredibly strong & wise woman. I am in awe of your positive attitude. Of course you had to mourn the loss of what could have been, but you are so right on by looking at the beautiful children that you have been blessed with. You & Lee are amazing parents. Your family is rock solid. We love each and everyone of you. I admire your courage & your willingness to follow promptings. Hugs.
Lara...I am so sorry! You are such a positive force for good! I hope everything "works out" in your favor! Let me know if there is anything I can do to help!
Oh no, I am so very sorry for your loss. I admire your never ending positive attitude. I don't know what you decided to do but my sister opted out on the D&C a few weeks ago and just waited for things to happen on their own and really regrets it. I don't know how your first D&C was but it is already such an emotionally and physically sad time I am all for getting it over with quickly. I will be thinking of you and praying for you. xoxox
Lots of love to you and your family, Lara. You handle yourself so well, I'm taking notes from you.
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